Transition

Hello everyone! How are you? I hope you had a wonderful Christmas.

In a few hours it will be 2019. How are you feeling? Are you excited? I am grateful for the opportunity to be alive, because it means God is not done with my life or yours. However, I am also uncertain about what the New Year will bring.

The last two years of my life have been full of transition. In the beginning, it was marvelous, joyous and amazing. However, the second half was filled with uncertainty, pain, and loneliness. I never knew that transition ordained by God could cause so much pain.

When God is doing something new in us, we are excited about it. But we only want the good parts. The parts that won’t hurt or cause us to change. But the hard part is what God uses to transition us into the person He desires us to be.

I began to ponder on the process of transition and God brought the birth process to my mind. When a woman finds out she’s pregnant, it is a time of joy (most times). During the first trimester, she may experience nausea, but other than it is glorious. She has her first ultrasound, hears the heartbeat, and finds out the sex. It is exciting.

The second trimester brings little discomfort. The baby is constantly growing. You feel flutters and kicking, all while enjoying this perfect gift from God. You have cravings and don’t feel as guilty about eating the foods you want (Well, I didn’t 😊).

The third trimester, for most women, is the time of their greatest discomfort. You may have some fear as you don’t know what it will be like as the birthing process for each woman is different. Your extremities may be swollen. You are tired of carrying the extra weight. You are tired. Your belly is big and heavy. It is hard to sleep. You are ALWAYS using the facilities. The baby is continuously moving, because he or she is running out of space. Not long after, a woman’s water breaks and the real work begins.

It is during this process most women want it to be over. The pain…oh the pain. You are excited to meet your baby and you have been waiting for this moment. However, during this time, the pain you experience is at its highest peak. All this is happening while your blessing is arriving. And this is exactly what transition is. The process is joyous, uncomfortable, painful, and then joyful again.

John 16:21 – “When a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world.”

My transition is still very uncomfortable, and I want it to be over. But I am learning that when things are most painful, it means I am close to the finish line. It means my blessing is near.

Just because the clock turns twelve does not mean all of our problems will suddenly disappear. It does not mean your transition is over. Nor does it mean if things are good right now, it won’t change as the New Year begins. As we continue to walk with Christ, we will always be in a state of transition. I encourage you to keep going and NEVER give up. Have faith, cry, shout, pray, and cry some more if you must, but continue moving forward in Christ. Your blessing is coming…the promise is coming.

Romans 8:18 – I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.”

As we end 2018, I want to leave my favorite scripture with you:

Jeremiah 29:11-13 – “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.”

Happy New Year! No matter where you find yourself, God has great things in store for YOU! See you next year!

Darlene

 

Happy Thanksgiving!

Hello everyone! How are you on this Thanksgiving afternoon? 😊 I hope you are feeling blessed. I live in Georgia and the weather is beautiful today. The temperature will be about 60 and that is my husband’s favorite kind of weather. Later today, he will be outside on our deck grilling duck! Not my cup of tea, but it makes him happy.

I have been up since 6 am preparing for the day. A day of chopping, cooking, and cleaning; but most of all, giving thanks. As I cook, I am thankful for simply having food on my table with enough to feed my family and plenty of leftovers. Growing up, my Thanksgivings did not feel this way. The Thanksgivings I remember were filled with nervousness and anxiety because everything had to be perfect. Food cooked perfectly, the right outfit, and I had to be sure I said the right things.

Ephesians 5:20 – “Always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ” (NIV).

I am thankful that as I cook for my family, each of my children enjoys lending a hand in the kitchen. The oldest keeps it clean as I move from dish to dish. My little ones don’t ask for much because they understand the magnitude of what’s happening in the kitchen and that alone is helpful. Besides, they know the mac and cheese is coming…

I am thankful that my Thanksgiving is easy going. My children don’t have to worry about being dressed “properly” and doing and saying the right things. I am thankful that my home is full of God’s peace and joy.

My prayer as each of us prepares for Thanksgiving, is that we focus on what matters. It’s not the perfect turkey, the perfect meal or the perfect outfit. What matters is that you are here another year with the ability to give thanks to our God.

Happy Thanksgiving!

God, I Did It Right This Time…

            Psalm 34:18The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.

 

After being married for almost a year, I became pregnant with my first child. I was elated and a little scared at the same time because it had been ten years since that last time I was pregnant; but I was ready.

I thought to myself, this time I do not have to hide my belly; this time I can tell people; this time I am married and I have a man who truly loves me and is just as excited as I am about bringing a new life into the world. This time I am happy.

Then on Friday, November 23, 2007, it all changed. I went to work feeling good, but as the day progressed, I began to feel worse. I experienced cramping and later spotting. After I got home, I told my husband what I was experiencing and we reluctantly went to the emergency room.
We went to the hospital that evening and spoke with a cold and unsympathetic doctor who told us we were experiencing a miscarriage. I could not believe it and neither did my husband. Earlier that day, I had a feeling that it was happening but did not want to believe it so I prayed against it. Unfortunately, the miscarriage was becoming my truth.
How did things change so suddenly? This morning, I was happy with anticipation and by evening I had a feeling of grief so deep I could not share it enough to articulate. As the weekend slowly wore on, my heartbreak increased. Then, finally, it was over. I visited the doctor on Monday morning and there was no more baby. My brokenness was unbearable.
Then I thought, “God, I did it right this time.” I got married first and then had my baby. “Why is this happening?” “Did God love me?” If so, “Why did he allow this?” “Was I being punished for the things I did in my past?” “Is this punishment for having my first child out of wedlock?” “God Why?”
So…what do you do when you “do it right” and it still does not work out? You stand, trust and believe God’s plan for your life. Seems easy, but it is not especially when you are in the midst of your pain.  There are so many scriptures I could give, that give credence to this, but the one that comes to mind is one of my favorites which is Jeremiah 29:11, “for I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
A year later, I became pregnant again and we had our first son and two years after that, God gave me another baby that was part of His plan, but certainly not part of ours…lol…Praise God.

God gave me double for my pain and beauty for my ashes.  

The pain of losing a child never goes away, but I have peace knowing that I will see her at the appointed time. The bottom line is God is always in control even when things are out of control. He has a perfect plan that will always benefit us. However, it does not mean we will not experience pain to get to joy. But we still must trust the plan.

Love you all,

Darlene
#healedtospeak